"I began to complain less": American game designer about life in Russia

Richard Gray, creator of the cult game Duke Nukem 3D, who moved to Moscow 5 years ago, told the publication Snob about what can lead to a lack of good knowledge of the Russian language in the capital, and about self-control of the Russians.

Photos from personal archive

About dreams come true and attempts to explain the love of everything Russian

Long before my arrival in Russia, I began to develop a deep interest in this country, its culture and history - I wanted to know more, so I read, watched Russian films, television programs and news. Friends, knowing about my love for everything Russian, even made fun of me. And I stood my ground: “I will quit one day, move to Russia, buy a dacha, find a Russian wife for myself, start writing poems that I will read to her, and she will admire them.” Of course, I was joking. But what I really wanted - to come to Russia and marry a beautiful Russian woman - really came true. And now, when I look at my friends, I just want to say: “But I told you so!”.

My mother’s father’s family left Minsk during the revolution. My grandfather was born on a ship sailing to Canada. Perhaps partly my love for Russia is explained precisely by these distant roots.

After meeting my future Russian wife and my first visit to Moscow, I realized that I would like to live in Russia. But for all relatives and friends, my move is still beyond understanding. Even now they sometimes ask: "When will you, with your wife and daughter, move to America?" It seems they are waiting for the moment when I want to run back, but I really feel good in Russia.

I can not explain why I like this country so much. How to explain why my favorite ice cream flavor is vanilla? I don't know, I just like it.

About self-control and Russian spies

Russians are very calm - this is a quality that appeals to me. They are light on their feet and do not have the habit of complaining. Here I usually complain a lot. For example, when I do not like something in a restaurant, I will not be silent. But in Russia I began to complain less - I think this is how life in this country affects me. In any case, if it comes to your mind to complain about life to a Russian, he will simply answer: “So what?”.

A few years ago, the film “Spy Bridge” by Steven Spielberg was released. There is a scene that illustrates well the composure of the Russians. The action takes place during the Cold War. An American lawyer who defends a Soviet intelligence officer, seeing his calmness in court, asks the question: “Don't you worry at all? After all, if you are convicted of treason, they will kill you. ” And the Russian replies: “If I start to worry, will it help me? Change the court decision? Not? Then why bother? ” So Russians refer to all situations in life. If something cannot be changed, then there is no need to spend your nerves on it. Perhaps this is the influence of Eastern teachings: you must be able to let go of the situation, it is impossible to control everything. Of course, I admire such an approach, but sometimes it makes me angry: I was taught that when I get upset or angry, I need to let it out.

About Russian films and incomprehensible jokes

I like Russian militants because they are more realistic than American ones. When shooting Western films, they always enclose some territory in the city so that ordinary people do not get there, nothing superfluous can be in the frame. And when you look at a Russian fighter, you see real Moscow streets, cars are driving in the background, ordinary people are walking who have no idea that some large-scale motion picture is being shot.

I am also a big fan of Soviet films, especially comedies, one of my favorites - “The Caucasian Captive”. In our family tradition, we often watch Soviet comedies for Sunday dinner. And it is amazing that I find these films really funny.

The fact is that my friends tried to tell me Russian jokes thousands of times. I listen, I am waiting for a ridiculous climax, and at some point it turns out that it already sounded, but I did not notice. I even ask you not to try to tell such jokes - it is simply useless, it does not work with me.

About rush and late

The Moscow metro in many ways reminds me of the metro in New York - the smells, the sounds are the same. But here people are always in a hurry somewhere. For example, I see a guy running down the escalator, who is trying to catch the departing train before the doors close. That's where he is in such a hurry? The next train will arrive in two minutes.

And while the Russians are constantly late. On average, about fifteen minutes.

Photo: Valentin Kozin / Creative Commons

About situations in which a foreigner who has little knowledge of Russian can get

Of course, Russian is not easy to learn, but I try. When I first came to Russia and tried to communicate with the Russians, they were very amused.

When the grandmothers in the store heard me, as a foreigner, say something in Russian, they broke into a smile. At such moments, it seemed to me that now one of them would fit and pat me on the head.

Once my wife ordered sushi, and I came to pick them up at a restaurant. Then I lived in Russia for a whole year and knew very little Russian, I could easily get confused in the meaning of words with similar sound. It happened at that time. Intending to pick up the order, I began to explain: “My wife said sushi. " I was heard first by one waiter, then by another, the third. I repeated this phrase and even put my hand to my ear, picturing a phone call, but the attendants only looked at each other in confusion. They stretched the menu to me, showed me towards the sushi bar. And I was already desperate for not being able to explain such a simple thing: I want to pick up the ordered sushi. In the end, one waitress, by some miracle, guessed what I asked for and made the order. Only after I left the restaurant and headed towards the house, I understood my mistake. The words "said" and "ordered" are so similar.

I love to give my wife flowers, and somehow, walking past a flower stand, I saw three huge, beautiful bouquets in front of him - they looked amazing, it was exactly what I wanted to give to my beloved Ole. I turned to the saleswoman: "How much do they cost?" She shook her head in response and said, "No." I thought: maybe I said something wrong? Decided to try again. And again I heard “no”, said in a slightly irritated tone. The thought struck me that this bouquet was probably booked in advance by someone, then I pointed to the next one and asked: “How much?”. The saleswoman for the third time answered negatively, this time adding something else in Russian, but I did not understand the meaning. I stood in confusion and embarrassment while she looked at me. I decided to try my luck to the end and pointed to the third bouquet. The saleswoman came up to me, took my hand and brought it to the flowers so that I could touch them. It turned out that it was a very beautiful plastic demonstration bouquets that were not intended for sale.

Another time we went with friends to an entertainment center where there was a bar, bowling alley and club. We were having a great time. There were a lot of people around, but we stuck to our group. Suddenly some unfamiliar drunken man with tattoos, turning to my English speech, headed towards us. My friends greeted me reservedly, but looked very worried. I told him: “Hello, please, I don’t speak Russian.” He began to answer me something, behaving, perhaps, too unceremoniously - he was very drunk. And yet, my friends took control of the situation, somehow agreeing with him to disperse peacefully. Then they told me that it was “bro” and that he said something like: “Stop me *** -> this guy is not an American. I’ll make him speak Russian now.” It turned out that foreign speech not only touches grandmothers, but can cause serious trouble.

On the relationship between Russians and Americans, which could be

In 2007, I was in Vladivostok. When I served in the US Navy in 1970, it was a very closed city — even Russian citizens could not come there without special permission. And in 2007, I saw a picture that was impossible for the times of the Cold War: Russian submarines stood side by side with the Americans, sailors from the United States and Russia walked along the embankment past McDonalds, pizzerias and local Russian restaurants. It seemed that the world had finally arrived, that all was well. It is a pity that lately everything is changing for the worse again.

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