Ukraine and Russia united flashmob on social networks - #I am not afraid of the skazati

On social networks on Monday launched a flash mob under the hashtag#I do not fear: women talk about cases of physical and moral violence against them. The initiator of the action was the Ukrainian journalist and social activist Anastasia Melnichenko. Flashmob in several countries picked up groups and organizations that deal with the problems of violence.

“I want women to speak today. So that we talk about the violence that most of us have experienced. I want us not to make excuses “I walked in sportswear in broad daylight, but they still caught me”. Because we do not need to make excuses. We are not to blame, the rapist is always to blame. I am not afraid to speak, ”Anastasia Melnichenko wrote on her page on the social network. Facebook.

Stories that tell girls, can be terrified and add new phobias:

“I'm 13 years old. I walk along Khreshchatyk, carry home a package of products in each hand. Suddenly, the uncle, who goes to meet, dramatically changes the trajectory of movement and with acceleration enough between the legs. He grabs so much that he raises me in his hand. I am so shocked that I just don’t know how to react. The uncle lets me go and calmly moves on, ”Anastasia describes an incident from her own life.

Flashmob provoked an avalanche of confessions about violence against women - instantly picked up by hundreds of users of social networks in Ukraine and abroad. Here are some of them.

“The night train is Chernivtsi — Kiev, October, I am in a long vest and black jeans. I went to the end of the car for boiling water. The conductor embraced and tried to drag into his compartment. She escaped, ran away, did not sleep the rest of the night. When I came out in Kiev, this schmuck looked into my eyes and brazenly smiled, - writes Olga. - No behavior and clothing will not protect against harassment. A short skirt attracts animals of one species, and a shapeless chlamyda - of another. ”

“I was 7 – 8 for years. In the summer, while my grandmother was in the garden, two cousins, 10 and 11, squeezed me on the bed and imitated sexual intercourse. All were dressed. I didn’t tell anyone ... ”- a terrible fact from Catherine’s biography.

“My friend and I were skiing in the yard in the yard, she was 7, I was 6. We went to the entrance, and on the first floor we met a neighbor from the tenth floor. He asked us to watch his sled. We, of course, agreed. He starts to take off his pants. Decent polite and small, we turn away, thinking that he just wanted to “to the wind”. And he says in such a kind, gentle voice: “Girls, don't turn away, you can look. Look, I said! ”,” Says Stanislav.

The authors of these stories themselves consider them "not very scary", "non-lethal." Next - stories about rape and harassment, harassment and beatings, psychological pressure and domestic terrorism. Husbands and fathers, teachers and coaches, neighbors and colleagues, classmates and fellow students, fellow travelers and passengers, just passersby are capable of one word, movement or the intention to break life.

Women of different ages decided to talk about their tragedies in social networks, so that at least someone heard them and understood. Thousands of stories of pain and humiliation spilled onto the web. Tens of thousands of comments: “I was exactly the same”, “I didn’t tell anyone”, “I live with it”, “I tried to forget”, “I was ashamed to confess”, “We went to the police - the militiamen were entertaining asking shameful questions to me”.

Male user reaction

Male users of social networks during the first few hours after the start of the flash mob were clearly shocked.

“My God, I would never have thought that there are so many bastards in the world!” - this is one of the few adequate comments.

“I read several women's stories and quit because it’s terrible. But this is true, and this makes it even more scary, ”wrote Ukrainian journalist Vakhtang Kipiani.

But the vast majority of male comments, alas, are reduced to sarcasm.

“In response to the anti-male flashmob, # I am not afraid, I propose to respond with a mirror flashmob # woman Dynamo. You know, everyone happens differently in their lives, but this does not mean that they are all idiots, ”one Vyacheslav Ponomarev suggested on Facebook and even found like-minded people.

“Do not wear short skirts, and you will be happy. Do not provoke, ”one Vladimir Muromov insists on Twitter.

“Now it seems to me that this is the most impressive flash mob since the hashtag icon was invented. A terrible world, terrible we are, half-people-half-people, ”the Ukrainian journalist Andrei Dikhtyarenko believes. He believes that with their stories women prove: it’s not about clothes or lifestyle.

As the seven-year-old girl can provoke, users ask questions. Who said that a freshman would only be happy if a couple of undergraduates give her an insensitive state and take advantage of it? And the main question is: why should women always keep in mind that they could potentially be raped, and men, as a rule, do not even think that rape or even just touching without consent of another's body is a crime?

“We are told: do not wear tight, do not walk through the dark streets, do not drink wine, do not take the elevator with strangers. But no one says to men: do not rape the girls! ”, Says user Alina Koval.

Irina Kosterina notes that men, even progressive and liberal, try to avoid those who are probably “identifying themselves with rapists”, and try not to realize that this can happen somewhere near them.

In a day, residents of other countries joined the flashmob, and chilling stories became thousands of times more.

A resident of Veliky Novgorod, Yulia Forkina, summarized:

“This is not only sexual violence, it is physical, emotional violence in our lives ... A few years ago I was at a big Russian conference on child abuse. And most importantly, what I remember in a few days of the conference: the one who was subjected to violence almost always commits violence. ”

Doctor of Sociological Sciences Lyudmila Vasilenko notes that violence and the “programming” of a person for violence begins in a family: a child who sees violence in childhood “you don't want it or not, becomes the same in an adult state”.

The expert noted that women of Russia and Ukraine took an active part in the flash mob: “There are no differences between contradictions and contradictions between women in general human problems, one problem”. “Violence is a problem that is dissolved in everything and everywhere: in culture, in everyday life, in relation to power,” Irina Kosterina agrees. “When I wrote my post, I basically put the Ukrainian hashtag first. It is their initiative, it is their merit. I say thanks to the Ukrainian girls for starting this story. ”

According to Irina Kosterina, the project has already crossed the borders of the two countries: many women from other CIS countries, for example Georgia, Kazakhstan, Belarus, have joined it.

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