How a hobby saves in exile: the story of a Ukrainian woman who moved to Washington

Relocation is worse than a divorce, British sociologists found out. They interviewed more than 2000 people, and 40% of them admitted that moving was the biggest stress in their life. And if it comes to moving to another country? Journalist "Voices of America" Ksenia Turkova spoke about how a hobby helps in emigration. Next - from the first person.

Фото: Depositphotos

Many of those who have moved to another country have heard of the so-called U-curve adaptation, introduced by Kalervo Oberg back in 1954. This curve describes the four stages of adaptation to a new country. The first of them is tourist, full of euphoria from the impressions and from the fact that you were able to move at all. The second is the most difficult, this is a period of severe crisis, during which disorders, depression, and even neurological problems often begin. The third stage is adaptation. The fourth is the stage of biculturalism, when the migrant is already fully adapted to the world around him.

I heard a lot of stories about the second, most traumatic stage. But although my move (and I moved alone with a small child) was very difficult, I happily passed this stage for some reason.

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When I ask myself the question “why?”, Each time I come to the conclusion that my hobby helped me a lot. Many are surprised: “But when moving to a hobby? Where can I get the strength on him? ” In fact, this is the paradox: exactly what we really love to do, supports us and gives strength, and does not take away.

I would like to tell a story about how my hobby helped me in emigration, and maybe this will help someone else.

I am interested in swing dancing. She started dancing in Kiev a year before the move. As soon as I flew to Washington, the first thing I did (even before I started looking for housing) was typing “swing dancing, Washington” on Google. I found several studios, and sent letters to everyone: I told about myself and said that I wanted to dance.

The next day, I received a response from the owner of one of America's largest swing dance schools: “Come on Saturday to a party at Glen Eco Park, meet you!” Naturally, I went to a party and immediately got acquainted.

I decided for myself: no matter how difficult it is for me here and no matter how much time household chores take up at first, I will under no circumstances sacrifice my hobby. Moreover, I will, as they say, take everything from life, that is, participate in everything I can.

After the first party, I signed up for classes, then for one more, there were more and more acquaintances, I felt that I was not only developing in dancing, but also making friends. Around me became more and more people with whom I could not only dance, but just communicate.

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My dream was to perform in the traditional Independence Day parade, and I did it! She also performed at other holiday parades, took part in staging funny numbers, went to dance camps, and even combined her hobby with work - she filmed several stories about jazz dancing, and one of them - about the Lindy Hop legend Jean Veloz - received more than a million views.

Thanks to dancing, I even got my first car in America: I bought a car from a dancing friend who moved to Europe.

Thanks to dancing, I got a dog - one of the teachers works in a charity organization that places dogs in families.

I celebrated Thanksgiving, my favorite American holiday, with my dance “family.” And when everyone at the table talked about who and what they were grateful for, I said that I was most grateful to them - for the fact that my life here is much happier than it could be.

Hobbies help you fight stress, lift your spirits, help you learn new things, boost your self-esteem, and - importantly - immerse you in a familiar environment because you are continuing to do what you were doing before.

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Therefore, my advice is: never give up your hobby, do not give up what you love. If you find yourself in another country where everything is unfamiliar at first, it is a hobby that will most likely help you feel happy. By the way, they say that among emigrants it is a hobby that most often becomes the basis for a new job or business.

The original column is published on the website. Ukrainian service “Voices of America”.

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